Today is about stillness.
I woke up after not-enough-sleep, got the kids dressed, fed, lunches made, out the door and to school.
Went to work, picked up things, answered emails, designed some business cards, labels and ads, answered more emails.
Left the office, checked on my consignment balance and picked up some fall clothes for the kids. Organized some things in the home office, put together some Fishful Thinking goody bags for next week, heated up leftover Chinese food, tried for the 4th time this week to rid the carpet of our almost-12-year-old dog's latest puke fest, put away dishes, cleaned the kitchen.
Answered more emails, picked up the kids from school, had snack time with the kids, changed a diaper (not mine. yet.), cleaned up toys, took some pictures.
Now one tot is walking around the house in princess shoes singing songs, while the other is figuring out which toys he wants to keep and which I'm allowed to give away (one guess which pile is bigger).
And I'm sitting here typing. Tap tap tap. It doesn't sound like a horrible day, but it has been. It has been a monster of a day. It has been one of those days that makes me question what on earth I did to make the karma gods angry and pelt me with one craptastic situation after another. I fought the suckiness tooth and nail and I'm still not quite sure who won. I'm not quite sure I have the energy today to care.
While madness piled on me throughout the day, I became more and more still. I am trying to listen to my gut, my heart, my head all at the same time, but everybody's quiet today.
Today is not a day for answers, and this is ok. It's ok to have a sucky day and just be.
And now the littles are restless for mommy to stop the tap tap tapping and to start the making of the evening meal. Tomorrow will most definitely be a better, brighter day. But tonight, I'm content sitting still in whatever this is, and just letting it be.